This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Scarlett Kiaras-Attari, a marketing executive and education content creator who moved to the UK for her studies. It has been edited for length and clarity.
I was born in London to an Iranian-British father and an American mother, but I was raised in Louisville, Kentucky. Throughout my childhood, my dad shared fond memories of growing up in the UK, and I became enamored by the idea of living there again.
When deciding where to go for college, it was an easy decision to go to the UK, as I also hold a British passport. But where I grew up, it’s not common to go abroad for college. Most of my peers stayed in the South — even moving to New England was considered far.
I applied to a few safety schools in the US but got accepted to the University of Edinburgh. In 2018, I packed my bags and moved to Scotland.
I enjoyed student life in Scotland
At Edinburgh, I could study what I wanted — History — and didn’t have to fiddle with other subjects, which would have been required at most liberal arts programs in the US.
The price was also a huge advantage. I paid around $24,500 a year, compared to $67,446 for out-of-state tuition at the University of Chicago, where I had also applied.
As a student under 22, I could travel for free by bus throughout Scotland.
The advantage of studying there was also being able to experience new cultures and visit other European countries.
After graduating, I had no desire to return to the US
I wanted to pursue a master’s in medieval history. Although there are so many great departments in the US for religious studies and medieval history, my mentors at school had all studied at Oxbridge — colleges across Oxford and Cambridge. So, in 2022, I followed their advice and pursued a master’s in Medieval History at the University of Oxford.
When I finished my master’s this year, I still wasn’t ready to leave. I didn’t want to return to the US because all my friends were in the UK. If I returned, I would have to start again to build connections and friendships.
I was in this middle ground where I wished I could just pack up everything and move everything in my life altogether at once. That’s the difficulty of expat life — there’s the US in the UK version of myself, and I’m always teetering between two places.
Looking back, I cringe at how obsessed I was with the UK
I was fascinated by William Shakespeare’s “Richard III” and adored “Horrible Histories” — a British children’s TV show about historical events — and other media that came from the UK.
When you romanticize a place, you think it can do no wrong. After my move, I realized that the UK does not have the glowing hearts around it as I had pictured. It has its quirks and flaws — but I still love it.
When I first got here and felt frustrated about life in the UK, I would remember being a child and seeing a double-decker bus — a symbol of the UK from an international perspective.
I’d look at it intently and think, “This is the magic of the UK. This is where I wanted to be.”
I plan to stay in the UK to further my studies
In September, I will start my Ph.D. in Classics at King’s College London.
Although I used to think that I’d stay in the UK, I’ve recently started to think about how my family members are getting old.
I miss my family. I call and text them all the time, and my parents come to visit every so often. As a student, I’ve had the flexibility to go home around the December holidays. Sometimes, I don’t even realize how long it’s been since I’ve seen them in person.
I have four more years in the UK to complete my Ph.D, and I know the US will always be there for me. So, I’m open to returning at some point.
Do you have a story about choosing to attend college outside the US that you want to share? Get in touch with the reporter, Erin: eliam@businessinsider.com.
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