I recently had the opportunity to update my résumé. Not having worked outside the home in nearly seven years, I have to admit, the idea of a job in the traditional sense of the word is kind of exciting.
For those in the daily grind, that is probably hard to understand, but as a stay-at-home mom, there are things that I miss about having a job to go to every day. Things like getting dressed and having conversations with someone above the age of 6, for one, but also things like doing work that is validated by society.
I felt like I needed to explain the gap in my resumé
Once I finished editing my résumé, I couldn’t help feel the need to explain more about what I have been doing as a stay-at-home mom.
Just the term “stay-at-home” mom makes me cringe because it immediately brings up these images of a woman sitting in her house to mind. In our go, go, go culture, it sometimes seems like people don’t really know what moms do and there’s this idea that we are just “at home” and that we took the easy way out because we are lazy or unambitious.
Motherhood gets a bad wrap in our world. Mom’s work is seen as marginal, something we get a nice card and flowers for on Mother’s Day, but not something that would ever be considered as an experience that’s applicable to a job.
But take out the caregiving duties, the feeding, bathing, dressing, tending to emotional needs of the kids, take out the 24/7 job commitment, shouldn’t there be a spot for the logistical coordination? The mental load, the coordination of schedules, doctor appointments, kids’ sports or activities, birthday parties, family functions, holiday celebrations, etc.. And then there’s the educational support, the homework, all of the educational activities. Shouldn’t any of those things make it to the résumé in some way?
I’ve been doing so much that is applicable to my job hunt
But I have to be honest; it wasn’t just the actual work of motherhood that I felt was missing a place on my résumé. What about all of the other stuff that I have been doing?
I founded a local chapter of MOMS Club, a support group for at-home and part-time working moms, and we are celebrating five years this year. What about all of our work planning playdates, field trips, and service projects in the community — is this all just mom work, too, or shouldn’t there be a place for that on the résumé as well?
Motherhood requires continuous adaptation, not to mention the steep learning curve. There is absolutely no manual, and moms have to just learn as they go.
Being quick to learn, flexible, and resilient are certainly skills any employer would value, and motherhood requires this from day one. Yet here I am, just hoping someone will read between the lines on my résumé on everything that means to be “just” a mom.
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